The only way to kill Dracula, legend has it, is to drive a wooden stake through his heart. It's excruciatingly painful, but it's quick.
If only we could do that with the 50th Congressional District race.
But no, we still have more than a week before the June 6 election, which by my estimation means we will be exposed to an additional 5,326 print, TV and radio commercials, give or take a smear.
True, there is a lot at stake here, just not the vampire vanquishing kind, and not for those of us who live in the district. Whether it's Francine Busby or Brian Bilbray who wins the day, he or she will be so far down the power pyramid that neither one will be able to do squat. OK, maybe they'll get to reauthorize Mother's Day as a national holiday before they have to start running for the seat for real.
We'll be lucky if they rearrange the furniture in their new office suite before they are back here campaigning all over again. No, this is a fight to the death for Republicans who want to hold on to the seat, and Democrats who want to regain the House.
So when Vice President Dick Cheney came to town last week as guest of honor for a Bilbray fundraiser, Busby was well aware that the event was translating into more money for more slam ads. But before you get your knickers in a twist, the Republicans aren't the only ones to blame. There is plenty of mud being slung by the Busby side to mess up the tailored blue suits she has been favoring lately.
“I grew up in the sausage business, and I know baloney when I see it,” Busby said, quoting a line from her anti-Bilbray ad that will run until June 6.
Her lunch appearance on the day of the Cheney visit was far more low-key – a meeting of the Asian Business Association of San Diego at Jasmine Seafood Restaurant in Kearny Mesa. Before going in to shake hands, she sat down at an empty table to talk about the last few days of the race. As fragrant dim sum clattered by on a metal trolley, the former self-professed soccer mom discussed the final days with the self-assurance of an old pro campaigner.
“I would really like to talk about the way Congress works, health care, the cost of gas, the failed energy policy” Busby said, warming up to her central theme.
But like it or not, it's immigration issues that are taking center stage, I insisted.
“It's not the only issue on the mind of every person in the district,” Busby countered, adding that she supports the McCain-Kennedy immigration bill and rejects that it's amnesty in disguise.
McCain will be in town later this week, appearing at another fundraiser – for Bilbray. He's not the only senator stumping in this race, though.
For her part, Busby has her own heavy hitter scheduled and will be honored at a lunch Saturday featuring Sen. Dianne Feinstein.
As we get down to the wire, it will be more of the same. More money, more slam ads on both sides, and that's not even taking into consideration the 11th-hour campaign of Bill Hauf and his bank account.
If you want to hear any more from Busby or Bilbray, there are still several forums left, including one Friday, at the Carlsbad Harding Community Center.
But you already know how you're going to vote, don't you? You haven't been living under a rock these past few months ,which is why this whole mess has turned me into one cranky constituent.
Just about everything I've read or heard about this race carefully looks at the candidates, the issues, the effect of that guy who used to hold the seat and is now vying for inmate of the month honors in the federal pen, the attack ads, the millionaire spoiler candidate and concludes that none of it makes any difference. When it comes down to it, the prevailing wisdom has it that only one thing really counts: More registered Republicans are in the district than Democrats, so everyone will toe the party line and Bilbray will win hands down.
But don't be so sure. Prevailing wisdom may smack up against much of the country's disgust with the party in power right now. It may not. But at least consider that when the long night of this campaign is finished, the person walking out of the graveyard very well could be Francine Busby, a school board member in a blue tailored suit, smiling and carrying a big stake.
Mary Curran-Downey can be reached at mary_currandowney@hotmail.com
