LACEY, Wash. – He's flipped through the photographs, listened to the stories, read through all the letters. But more than a month after he left his home in Washington state and woke up in Denver with no memory, Jeff Ingram still has no idea who he is.
“Family vacations, high school graduation, prom night . . . your first dance, your first kiss. That's all lost,” Ingram said.
“It's very hard to put into words,” he said. “It's probably the most frustrating thing that a person can ever go through . . . to lose their identity. Because your past is what makes you who you are today – good or bad.”
What Ingram remembers is waking up in Denver on Sept. 10 and feeling alone and terrified. He had no idea who or where he was. He had no wallet or ID, just $8, the clothes he was wearing, and a pounding headache.
For several hours he wandered the streets, pleading for help from strangers, before winding up at a hospital for testing as a John Doe. Doctors determined the memory loss came from a disorder called dissociative fugue, a rare type of amnesia that can be triggered by stress.
A nationally televised plea – “If anybody recognizes me, knows who I am, please let somebody know” – led to a reunion last week with his fiancee, Penny Hansen.
Ingram, a 40-year-old former millworker, and Hansen, a state government worker, sat hand in hand Wednesday as they thanked police, doctors, family and friends who helped bring Ingram home.
Ingram had been on his way to Canada to visit a friend dying of cancer when he disappeared, and Hansen has said the stress involved in that might have triggered the amnesia. Police in Denver have said they believe fully that Ingram's amnesia is real.
So far, though, few doctors have been able to help Ingram with the disorder, the couple said. They are asking that any experts who might be able to help contact them.
According to his relatives, Ingram suffered a similar memory loss in 1995, when he vanished for about nine months. He surfaced in Seattle, but had no recollection of his previous life.
Ingram said yesterday that his friends told him he was pretty much the same guy he was before he disappeared, but a few things have changed. Food for example. He said on ABC's “Good Morning America” that he's been told he didn't like green peppers or coconuts, but he likes them now.
Ingram said he remained hopeful the pieces will fall into place someday.
“I just keep trying everything, hoping something will click and just open it up,” he said. In the meantime, “I go through my intuition because I don't have any memories coming back. . . . But me being here, I know I'm in the right place.”
