When 50 San Diego County mothers are feted today at a Mother's Day luncheon, some might wonder why Chuck Warren is among them.
It's because his son, Brady, a fifth-grader at Dingeman Elementary in Scripps Ranch, entered him in a “Best Moms” contest – and Chuck was chosen one of 50 finalist honorees.
“Ever since my mom died from cancer, my dad has been both my mom and dad,” wrote Brady. “My dad is a chef, a maid and a coach.” He adds: “My dad can make the best tacos in San Diego.”
This year marks Time Warner Cable's seventh Mother's Day contest, and the student essays illustrate San Diego's rich diversity.
Many are about recent immigrants – from Afghanistan, China, Korea, the Philippines, Mexico and elsewhere – who struggle to raise their families against overwhelming odds.
Poway High freshman Daniel Mussad says his mother, who grew up in Egypt, came to America with her three children and nothing else. She now works three jobs to make ends meet.
“She wakes up at 3:30 a.m. to go to work as a nutritionist at a school district . . . then works as a substitute janitor for Poway school district and (for) Costco in a part-time job on the weekends. Then she arrives home at 8 p.m., helps out with my homework, then goes to sleep, so she can wake up early and do it all over again. . . . She never buys clothes, jewelry or anything for herself. . . . She never complains about how stressful it is, and she loves us unconditionally.”
Another mom who came to America in search of freedom was an Afghan refugee whose husband had been killed by terrorists.
“My mother left her own family behind, and she brought us to this beautiful nation, America, in 2001,” writes Zohal Abdul Latife, 10, of Lexington Elementary in El Cajon.
“I remember how she was fighting days and nights to bring us here, and she did. Her number one goal was to give us the world's best education and life. I know that she misses her family a lot, but she made that sacrifice for her children . . .
“My mother is my heaven and my earth; she is my soul and my heart!”
So many challenges
Other special moms are wives of deployed military personnel who juggle two and sometimes three jobs while raising children and functioning as both mom and dad.
Some moms face the hardship of caring for children with devastating illnesses.
One son of a single mom has bones “as fragile as glass or raw spaghetti.” By age 14 he had suffered 100 broken bones, not counting seven in the womb. Another mom cares for a son with skin so delicate every rub or scratch creates a painful blister.
Kelsey Morasco, a Valley Center High senior, writes: “My mom has something over other moms. She has had to raise two dwarf children. . . . She has inspired me not to think negatively about my height. . . . My mom told me . . . 'What you think about is what you can do that other people cannot.' For example, what 17-year-old can still be held in her mother's arms?”
Larissa Snyder, a fifth-grader at Lexington Elementary, praises her mom for staying by her side when she was in the hospital for almost a year battling cancer.
“All my friends' moms went to (stay at) the Ronald McDonald House, but my mom always stayed right by my side watching. She only left to take showers and put on new clothes.”
Many moms try to keep their own illnesses at bay, doing their best to hide the pain and fatigue of their personal wars against cancer, multiple sclerosis and other diseases. One young Marine wife, who learned that she was genetically predisposed to breast cancer, was so worried that she had both breasts surgically removed.
“She didn't want us to ever have to be without a mother,” wrote her 9-year-old daughter.
Always giving
Self-sacrifice is a common “mom” theme. Christina Porfilio's daughter, Kelsey Newman, a junior at Santana High, told how her mother donated a kidney to a family acquaintance in Orange County.
“My mom is a single mom, and we live in a small duplex in Lakeside. She showed me that even if you don't have a lot, a selfless act like this makes you a true hero – but she still doesn't believe that she is one.”
Moms don't just give to their own families but to others in need, as well. San Diego ninth-grader Taylor Carpenter describes his single mom as having a “heart so big that it cannot be X-rayed . . . Whenever a homeless person asks her for money, she says, 'How about some food instead?' Then she'll drive to McDonald's or Burger King and get what they want and then drive it back to them.”
Diego Drulhe-Navarro, a fourth-grader at Poway's Morning Creek Elementary, says his mom, a divorcé who works with autistic children, doesn't make much money, but that doesn't stop the family from helping others. “After the (October) fires, she had us go through our clothes and toys to donate. We also went to volunteer in a food warehouse during our vacation . . .
“Mom says she feels old, fat and tired,” writes Diego. “I look at her and see my beautiful, loving, helpful mom.”
Diane Bell's column appears Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. Fax items to (619) 260-5009, call (619) 293-1518 or e-mail to diane.bell@uniontrib.com.
